Since the loss of our son last November, I have had many people try to make sense of the situation, and inadvertently say things that were offensive to me. They weren’t intentionally trying to upset me and my partner. Yesterday I found this link to Still Standing Magazine on Facebook, and thought it was worthy of sharing. It sums up societies reaction to losing a baby.
Imagine if people said things like this to you:
Your father passes away. Imagine if when you speak of him you’re told, “Well at least you have your mother”.
Your grandmother passes away. Imagine if every time you mention her and how much you love and miss her people cringe and say, “You should really move on”.
Your best friend passes away. Imagine if you reach out for comfort only to be told, “That’s awful, but at least you can always make more friends”.
People don’t make comments like this to these situations. So what makes it OK to say it about the death of a baby, regardless of gestational age? Comments like this do not aid healing. They fuel the pain and grief we experience.
I hope that one day these comments are not made, and people can understand that this is a real pain we experience.
To view the full article, click here.